Escape From Jurai
by Davner
Summary: Snake Kuramitsu?!


Tenchi Muyo is the property of AIC. Escape From LA is the property of John Carpenter.  
  
Another lost fic!  
  
Escape From Jurai  
  
  
  
IN THE FIFTY-FIRST YEAR OF THE REIGN OF AZUSA, THE CRIME RATE ON NEW JURAI, JURAI'S LARGEST COLONY, REACHED HEIGHTS UNPRECEDENTED IN HISTORY. EMPEROR AZUSA, IN AN EFFORT TO CONTROL THIS SPREAD IN CRIMINAL ACTIVITY, DECLARED NEW JURAI OFF LIMITS TO TRAVEL AND MADE IT THE JURAIN EMPIRE'S LARGEST PENAL INSTALLATION.  
  
INDEPENDENT POWER DISPERSION SATELLITES RING THE PLANET. THESE SATELLITES MAKE IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO USE JURAI POWER OR ANY OTHER INTERNAL POWERS. THIS MAKES NEW JURAI THE IDEAL PLACE FOR KEEPING DANGEROUS A-1 CLASS CRIMINALS ONCE THEY ARE BROUGHT TO JUSTICE.  
  
LIKE AN INVADING FLEET, THE JURAI ROYAL NAVY BLOCKADES NEW JURAI, ENFORCING THE ONE RULE ASSOCIATED WITH THE PLANET...  
  
ONCE SOMEONE LANDS ON NEW JURAI, THEY NEVER LEAVE...  
  
  
  
2001...  
  
Today...  
  
  
  
"KIIIIIIIIIIYOOOOOOOONEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"  
  
"NO, Mihoshi! That's final!"  
  
Mihoshi whimpered pathetically. "But how come you get to go on a special Galaxy Police operation and I don't?" the blonde GP whined as Kiyone straightened her uniform.  
  
Kiyone growled. She had been having this conversation with Mihoshi for the past three hours, and she still just didn't get it.  
  
"Because, Mihoshi! You're not the right type for this kind of work!" she snapped.  
  
Mihoshi blinked in shock. "But...But why not?" she whimpered.  
  
Kiyone growled again. "Mihoshi, you're a good GP officer...you're well trained...but you simply don't have that...killer instinct...that these kind of missions need."  
  
"But Kiyone..."  
  
"And unless you have that, you'll just end up getting killed."  
  
Mihoshi bowed her head and sniffled.  
  
Kiyone sighed. "I'll be back in a few days okay?"  
  
Mihoshi only nodded dully.  
  
Kiyone gave her a pat on the back before walking out the door to the nearby GP Spec Ops ship waiting for her.  
  
Mihoshi was so distraught at the way Kiyone left, she couldn't go to work. Instead, she had gone to Tenchi's. After explaining what had happened, tears in her eyes, Tenchi had offered to let Mihoshi stay at the house until Kiyone came back.  
  
Mihoshi, overjoyed by the offer, promptly hugged Tenchi tightly. This brought stares from Ryoko and Aeka, who were watching their soap opera nearby.  
  
"Oh, that reminds me," Mihoshi said, taking a blank VCR tape out of her bag. "Kiyone asked me to ask you to tape the soaps for her."  
  
"Of course," Aeka said. "What's this mission she went on, anyway?"  
  
Mihoshi sighed. "I don't know. Something about a hostage crisis on New Jurai."  
  
"New Jurai?" Ryoko asked. She shuddered. "The less I hear *that* name, the better."  
  
"It's a penal colony, isn't it?" Mihoshi asked.  
  
"Penal colony, hell!" Ryoko bit out. "The place is a rat-infested tomb."  
  
Aeka nodded. "For once, I agree. It's like nothing I've ever heard of before. It's a place where we put criminals we want to forget about...quickly. We Jurains aren't proud of it, but there's nothing we can do. We can't release the people there, they'd set the galaxy ablaze..."  
  
Ryoko shuddered again. "I feel creepy just being so near the place."  
  
Tenchi blinked. "What do you mean, Ryoko?"  
  
"New Jurai is probably the closest inhabited colony to Earth," Aeka explained. "You could get there in about three hours in hyperspace."  
  
"Yeah," Ryoko muttered in agreement, "Your realtor really screwed you..."  
  
Mihoshi felt her skin crawl. (Please be careful, Kiyone,) she begged. "I think I'm going to go take a bath," she said quietly, starting up the stairs.  
  
As she walked, she heard the conversation still going on below her.  
  
"I don't know who Kiyone pissed off to be put on that mission," Ryoko said, "But she should've turned it down flat."  
  
"Kiyone wouldn't do that," Aeka argued. "Especially if someone's life is at stake."  
  
"Yeah," Ryoko said dejectedly. "Still, you wouldn't see me going near the place."  
  
Mihoshi bit her lip and walked into the baths...  
  
As she soaked, she couldn't help but feel so...useless. Kiyone, her friend, the closest thing she had to a sister, was out there, in harm's way...  
  
And she couldn't do anything.  
  
Because she was weak.  
  
She sighed.  
  
Kiyone was right. She was great for handing out parking tickets and telling school children the importance of not doing drugs...  
  
But when it came to the *real* police work, she was useless...  
  
("You just don't have that killer instinct...")  
  
"I wish I could buy one," Mihoshi whimpered. Unfortunately, though, she couldn't just go down to the drug store and ask for a personality overhaul...  
  
She paused.  
  
Her head shot up in realization.  
  
"WASHU!"  
  
Mihoshi knocked and stepped inside Washu's lab without waiting for an answer. She found the pink-haired scientist's lab deserted. "Little Washu?" she called out. "Are you here?"  
  
Nothing.  
  
Mihoshi sighed. "How am I supposed to get Washu to give me a killer instinct if she's not here!?"  
  
She sighed again and looked around. Washu's holotop was still running, little cartoon crabs in th screen saver were running back and forth across the screen. She looked around and found a bookshelf. The blonde GP examined the titles and stopped on one in particular, her hand reaching up and pulling the paperback off the shelf.  
  
"'Jane's Guide to Washu's Lab,'" she read off the cover. "'2001 Edition...' Wow! These guys make books for everything!"  
  
She opened the book to the index and began searching.  
  
"Personality..." she whispered. "Personality...personality...treatments...examinations...IQ...Ah! Here it is! Alterations!" She opened the book to the right page and began to read. The book was complete with illustrations...  
  
Illustrations of a machine standing only a few feet from her.  
  
The machine was a chair that looked like something out of a John Carpenter movie, complete with metal shackles, a steel helmet, and dangerous looking electrodes.  
  
Mihoshi looked up and down from the book to the chair and back again. She smiled. "Piece of cake!"  
  
She sat down in the chair and read the instructions from the book. "'To alter one's personality in a form one sees fit, simply place the helmet on the subject's head, then input the proper parameters into the computer console on the right armrest...'" Mihoshi followed the instructions and put the helmet on. She looked down at the controls and hmm'd in thought. "I want...a ....um....more aggressive nature..." She clicked the buttons as she said this. "Cynical view on life and death..." More buttons clicked. "Ruthlessness towards enemies..." More clicks. "That oughta do it!" She hit the button marked, "Go."  
  
Suddenly, it was if she had stuck her head in a microwave oven set to high. She screamed as her brain seemed to expand and constrict over and over again. It hurt so much she couldn't breathe.  
  
From another part of the lab, she could hear a toilet flush, a door close, and whistling. Washu walked into the main area of the lab holding a newspaper. She didn't notice Mihoshi for a moment. She took a sip of coffee and turned in the GP's direction...  
  
She spit the coffee out.  
  
"MIHOSHI!"  
  
She ran to her holotop and began hitting buttons, cutting power to her Personality Blender.  
  
The pain in Mihoshi's head eased away. She took a deep breath, her head falling to her chest.  
  
"Mihoshi!? Mihoshi?!" Washu cried, running to her. She pulled the helmet off the blonde and shook her a little. She checked her pulse. She was alive. "Mihoshi! Speak to me! Say something!"  
  
Mihoshi opened her eyes and lifted her head. Her face was expressionless.  
  
Washu blinked. "Mihoshi? Say something."  
  
Mihoshi's lips quirked up in a dangerous smile.  
  
"Call me 'Snake...'"  
  
"'Snake?'" Ryoko asked incredulously.  
  
Washu, Tenchi, Ryoko, Aeka, and Sasami were gathered in the kitchen. 'Snake Kuramitsu,' was in the next room on the couch, watching Moldiver.  
  
"Total personality polar reversal," Washu told them. "Basically, the machine took the sweet, innocent, bubbly bubblehead we all know and love and well...Made her the Anti-Mihoshi."  
  
"I find it hard to believe that Mihoshi could turn into the kind of person you're describing," Aeka said. "I mean....It's *Mihoshi*!"  
  
"Okay, let's try a pop quiz," Washu said. "What if you were to ask Mihoshi to bring you something. A magazine, for example."  
  
"She'd probably just bring it to me."  
  
"Try it," Washu dared her.  
  
Aeka paused for a moment, then went to the door. "Mihoshi, could you bring me that magazine there on the table?"  
  
Mihoshi turned her head, looked at Aeka for a moment, then went back to watching Moldiver.  
  
Aeka turned back to them. "I think I see your point."  
  
"Can't you change her back, Washu?" Tenchi asked.  
  
"Unfortunately, when I cut power to the machine, it erased the parameters she entered. That means I can't reverse them without the risk of messing up her mind even worse."  
  
"So...What does this mean, Miss Washu?" Sasami asked, a little frightened by all the talk.  
  
"It just means I need some time to sift through the computer logs and find the parameters. In the meantime, just be careful around her, okay?"  
  
They all nodded.  
  
Mihoshi took another sip of beer as she watched her favorite Moldiver heroine beat up some bad guys. She heard a knock on the door, but didn't get up to check it. What did she care? It's not like they'd be looking for her.  
  
Fuck them.  
  
She heard the door open and Aeka greet whoever it was.  
  
"Princess Aeka? My name is Lieutenant Mitsuki Murisuma. I'm with the Galaxy Police Special Investigations Division. May I come in?"  
  
Mihoshi took another sip as Aeka invited the detective in. There was some talking from the kitchen. The voices got a little more hectic.  
  
Fuck them.  
  
She heard Aeka cry out, "Well, what are you doing about it?!"  
  
Sasami was crying.  
  
"What do you mean, 'NOTHING?!'" Aeka cried.  
  
Mihoshi turned the volume up on Moldiver.  
  
There was some more conversation. Ryoko was saying something about going herself. Washu butted in about then.  
  
She spoke for a few minutes.  
  
Then nothing.  
  
"Mihoshi?"  
  
She didn't turn.  
  
"Er...Snake?"  
  
She turned and saw Tenchi standing in the doorway.  
  
"What?" she asked.  
  
"Um...Can we talk to you for a minute?"  
  
She turned back to the TV. "Moldiver's on. Come back later."  
  
"It's very important," he assured her.  
  
She thought for a moment, then got up and went into the kitchen. She recognized Lieutenant Mitsuki from all the times she had tried to arrest Kiyone. Aeka was hugging Sasami as the blue haired princess cried into her sister's kimono. Aeka looked pretty distraught as well.  
  
"What?" Mihoshi asked irritably.  
  
Mitsuki turned to her. "Detective, the GP needs you."  
  
"Tell the GP I'm busy today," she said, going to the fridge to get another beer.  
  
Mitsuki was shocked. Washu left the room without a word.  
  
"Mihoshi," Aeka began, tears in her eyes, "Something terrible has happened..."  
  
"Get to the point," Mihoshi prompted darkly.  
  
"Two days ago," Mitsuki began, "The H.M.S. Fearless, a Jurain cruiser attached to the Queen's personal task force experienced a catastrophic engine malfunction near New Jurai. Before it could link up with the blockade force, the engines exploded. Her Majesty managed to get out in an escape pod, but the blockade force couldn't get to it before it crashed into the surface of the prison planet."  
  
"Sad story," Mihoshi commented, rooting around in the fridge. "Tenchi, you're out of Michelob," she told him.  
  
"Would you pay attention, Detective?!" Mitsuki demanded harshly.  
  
Mihoshi glared at her and pulled the tab on one of Noboyuki's light beers.  
  
"Only a few hours afterward, we sent in a special GP team to bring her out. A few hours after that, all but one of the team members were dead..."  
  
"Helluva team," Mihoshi commented. "Got a smoke?"  
  
"What the hell is your problem, Mihoshi?!" Mitsuki demanded.  
  
"Snake."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
Mihoshi smiled. "Call me 'Snake.'"  
  
Mitsuki blinked.  
  
Aeka stepped forward. "Mihoshi, they want you to go in after her."  
  
Mihoshi paused. "Why me?"  
  
"Because if any of us go in, we're dead," Ryoko told her. "Powers like mine or Tenchi's or Aeka's won't work on New Jurai. And the only other person nearby with enough training nearby with a shot is you."  
  
Mihoshi snorted. "Pass." She started walking away.  
  
"Please, Mihoshi!?" Sasami cried. "She's my mommy!"  
  
"Get a new mommy," Mihoshi told her, not even turning.  
  
Sasami gasped in shock at Mihoshi's statement.  
  
Tenchi frowned and walked up, grabbing Mihoshi by the elbow and turning her around so that she was facing him. "Mihoshi, I...gagh..."  
  
Mihoshi had grabbed him by the throat. "Don't push your luck, Earth boy," she growled. "You're not *that* cute..."  
  
"I think I know a way to resolve this!" Washu stated from the kitchen door. "Mihoshi...er...Snake...We can't *force* you to go."  
  
Mihoshi let Tenchi go.  
  
"But if you don't, there's a price to pay."  
  
Mihoshi's eyes narrowed. "What price?"  
  
"Remember how you asked us to tape the soaps for Kiyone?"  
  
Mihoshi said nothing.  
  
"Well, it turns out that instead of a blank VHS cassette to tape it on, you gave us your Moldiver OAV Gold Collection Tape."  
  
Mihoshi's eyes narrowed even further.  
  
"Now," Washu said innocently, "I wanted to make sure that nothing could *accidentally* stop Kiyone from getting her soaps...so I programmed the VCR, stuck the tape in, and locked it in a specially designed safe! This time tomorrow the tape will start to record the soaps right on..."  
  
Mihoshi leapt forward and grabbed Washu by the throat. "Take it out!" she growled in the scientist's face.  
  
Washu gasped out. "I...can't...The lock...is set...to Misaki's....genetic code....The only...one...who can......open the safe...is the....Queen of Jurai..."  
  
The blonde threw Washu to the floor. Washu looked up and saw Mihoshi glaring at her.  
  
Mihoshi threw a look to the others, who were staring on in shock.  
  
"You better hope I don't make it back," she growled to them.  
  
"Jurain RB-20 repeating blaster," Mitsuki said, showing Mihoshi the weapons and equipment she'd be using. Two and half hours had passed since Mihoshi had agreed to take on this mission. They had all crammed onboard Mitsuki's ship, the Arianna, and began their trip to New Jurai. Mitsuki only had a few hours to get Mihoshi properly briefed.  
  
"Three hundred extra rounds," Mitsuki went on. "Two MB-8 meson blasters..." She showed the blonde two large blaster pistols, the same model as Kiyone's. "The Jurains can't land on the planet without risking Misaki's life, but they are letting us use some of their equipment." She held up an armband. "This is a tracer. Every member of the royal family had a homing device surgically implanted. This will give you direction and distance."  
  
Mihoshi took the wrist band and put it on. She checked the clock on it, then the one on the wall and set it to a countdown. She had twenty hours left before the soaps came on and ruined her Moldiver tape. She saw a small box on the table and picked it up. She shook it.  
  
"Tooth picks," Mitsuki told her. "Wood."  
  
Mihoshi gave her a look.  
  
"Well...they *are* Jurains..."  
  
Mihoshi growled and pocketed them.  
  
"Stealth clothes," Mitsuki announced, showing Mihoshi a bundle of black clothing. "Flame retardant. Here." She gave them to her.  
  
Mihoshi looked them over. "Black's not my color," She said, tossing them back.  
  
Mitsuki frowned. "Tough!" She threw them back. "Now put them on."  
  
Mihoshi buckled the belt and adjusted the straps on the two thigh holsters for her hand blasters. Content that they were secure, she put the black leather coat on and flicked the collar up. Reaching over, she picked up the RB-20 and walked to the door... 


End file.
